


Unkind

by birchlogz



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Angst and Feels, Betrayal, Blood, Disabled Character, Everyone Needs A Hug, M/M, Not Beta Read, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-22
Updated: 2020-01-22
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:01:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22358380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/birchlogz/pseuds/birchlogz
Summary: Nature VS. Nurture. Or, who's side will you pick when they say your love cannot exist?(Or, when will I learn to write a good summary?)
Relationships: Engineer/Spy (Team Fortress 2)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 30





	Unkind

**Author's Note:**

> Spy's name in this is René, and Engie ofc is Dell Conagher!  
> title and lyrics in bold from the song Community Gardens by The Scary Jokes!

**Full disclosure; I am a monster.**

Stop me if you've heard this one before. A BLU espionage master and a genius RED engineer sat around a campfire.

Music radiated from the area, just far enough behind the RED base so that nobody will interrupt them. Dell's worn guitar seems to form his body perfectly, like an extension of his body. His hand is purposeful and methodical as he strums, every stroke landing exactly on it's mark.

Though René could never say it out loud, he was enamored by the man's skill. It sounded strangely homely, even if René never listened to anything of the sort when he was a child. Homesick for someone else's childhood, to fill the gap in his life. His mind was trekking miles through his thoughts, his eyes glazed over as he stared into the campfire.

The cigarette perching on his lips slipped into the snow as he was jerked out of his thoughts by a particularly loud and sour note from the guitar on the other side of the fire. Dell's face scrunched up as he placed the instrument down into the thin snowfall beside him. René watched as he clasped his hands together, trying to nonchalauntly cover up how the gloved hand was spasming strangely.

**A creature of despair- not that that should he a cause for concern.**

_A memory of the weeks before. Taking the shorter man aside from the battle, pressing up close against him, breath heavy._

"...Everything alright, Engineer? I am in no place to pry, I understand that- I just worry." Dell sniffled a little against the cold.

"'Course. I... It happens sometimes."

"That was the hand that got shot, no?.. I can assist, if it's bothering you. It's best to clean it up before it gets infected."

"No! No. Ain't gotta worry 'bout that, sonny. Don't you worry at all..." The engineer leaned down onto his back to look at the stars.

"We both got our secrets," he grumbled while looking away.

"Who doesn't? Secrets are what make us." Spy plucked the fallen cigarette from the ground with deft fingers and flicked it into the fire. The air between them is quiet again for a while. The fire feels like a mile spreading directly between them, an emotional rift that René has no clue how to even approach.

The engineer's voice is like a ladder clattering across a ravine.

**You'll be fine, you honeycomb. Who could ever hurt you? Who could be so cold?**

_A memory of blood on René's hands, a promise cut through like the man lying in front of him on the battlefield. The letter from the highest ups, demanding the men to cease_ _contact immidiately rang heavy in his mind's voice_.

"I like you, turncoat," he began. "Despite everything, I do. It ain't gotta be like this. The hidin', the fightin'- the damn secrecy." He let a heavy sigh out, watching his breath rise in the air, fingers tapping anxiously against the neck of the empty bottle clutched in his hand.

"It's not that simple, mon-"

"We've kissed. Made out, whatever. More than that, we've-... And I still dont even know what you look like. I don't think we've ever even touched bare skin."

René's gaze was glued back to the flames. "I can hear your teeth grinding from over here, laborer. You're drunk and stressed. Please just go back to your base. I'll take my leave and we can let go of zis."

"I'm not gonna just leave this, Spy! And this is exactly what I mean. You can read me like a book, and what do I know've you? The time we spent... I'll say it again. I like you. And I think that's gunna be the death of me." Dell was sitting upright once more, leaning on his gloved hand.

"You're too forgiving, _mon ours_. I'm no lover. My job is to backstab, and it's what I do best. I-" Another spasm ran through the engineer, causing him to nearly fall into the campfire, and René was nearly tripping over his own feet to check if the other man was alright. The spy kneeled on the ground, Dell's head resting in his lap facing up at René's face. The ground was wet with mud from the melted snow, and yet it didn't even cross his mind that his suit might dirty.

"Ahm just peachy, doll."

"You're obviously not doing as well as you say." "I'll get it fixed up tonight."

"You trust zat medic enough to let him anywhere near you after battle?" Dell just chuckled. The campfire was no match the the warmth blossoming in the Spy's heart as he saw the smile across his ~~lover's~~ rival's lips.

They sat there for a while, grey eyes locked on green. Renès features looked even sharper than his tongue from the harsh shadows cast from the fire. One of the engineer's hands was preoccupied with holding the leather glove resting upon his breast, keeping the spy close. The other, bare hand, was free to roam across the face above, petting his cheek through the cloth covering it.

"Monsieur Conagher..."

"Take off my glove, _Monsieur,_ " Engie murmured, interrupting.

"...You said it was your secret. I don't..."

"Stop whinin' an' do it. I trust you," he gently chided. The spy took the hand in his. It felt sharp and weighty. Unorganic. He didn't even need to look at it before it clicked in his head what was off about it.

"Why... have you not gotten it taken care of? I know zhat I just talked poorly of the medic, but I'm sure she could do something for you..." Dell shrugged while flexing his hand, his eyes breaking gaze to stare at it.

"Sometimes it's useful. Can change it up into whatever tool I need." He sniffled again, the cold seeping into his bones.

"But sometimes, I just feel like I deserve it. Like I ain't really a Conagher, an' I shouldn't... I don't..." Dell finally took off the thick rubber glove. The mechanical hand looked almost crude and ugly, though evidently had many moving parts that worked together in intricate ways. He ran his finger over the damaged metal and wiring on the wrist, gently pushing the bullet our from where it was lodged. "Sure did make it easier to strum if my fingers ain't gonna get tired," he said with a laugh. Their eyes met again, and finally Dell could really see the spy. His eyes weren't cold anymore. He could see the ache and pain and sorrow and real tears welling in his enemy's face.

"Oh, doll, please-"

"Don't forgive me. Don't. Zhe way I've treated you is... Unacceptable." The spy lifted his hands from where he'd been cradling the man beneath him, gripping his balaclava. He took a deep breath in and slipped it off. Dell was looking up at the stars again, but this time, the ones twinkling in the eyes above him. The spy's hair was jet black, save for roots tinged with grey age; it's loose, mussed up curls spilled in front of his eyes before he smoothed it back. The dark bags beneath his eyes were only made more intense with the harsh firelight. Small cuts and scars lined his face along his cheekbones and nose, crooked from improper setting after many breaks. The engineer's mouth opened for a moment, searching for something to say but finding nothing. He only reached up and pulled the other man down into a kiss. Their lips pressed together tenderly, both as timid as if this was their first time together.

"I trust you with my life, pumpkin," Dell whispered. The butterfly knife slid out of the sleeve where it was hidden and onto the ground, the blade glinting in the light.

"I tried to warn you, _mon amour,_ lord knows I did. You're too damn stubborn," the spy choked out through tears. He pressed his forehead into the engineers and took a deep breath, eyes shut so he didn't have to look at his expression. They sat there completely silent for a moment.

The spy placed a lit cigarette into the engineer's mouth before rising to leave.

"Now wait just a minute, string-bean, you can't jus' leave me in the dust! Where-"

The spy was gone, and the knife as well.

"And my darn guitar too."

Dell stared off back at the BLU base.

**You'll be fine, oh honey pie.** **Who could ever hurt you? Who could be so unkind?**

**Author's Note:**

> i'm so sorry for this xd maybe one day ill write a fix it for my own fic but for now... this it how it ends!  
> BTW, i'm really bad at tagging. if i missed anything, feel free to LMK!


End file.
